Poems. I wish I had money to release a book. On the other hand, who the hell is going to read it? Family? Friends? Geez, waste of money. Even though I'm being praised by the local poetic society, still... Nobody needs it. Again, on the other hand, I'm not writing because "somebody needs it". And, I don't want to be popular. Got enough problems apart from popularity.
School. It's been two months since I'am a teacher of English. And because of the university (time, people, time!) it's been two months since I'm not doing my job properly. Miserable cow. Well, at least I don't give bad marks for nothing. Although I should. For attitude. But what can I expect from 6-graders if I as a teacher don't do my job as well as I should? Damn.
Realtionships. God damn it, who said girls don't need sex? Oh yes we need it! And my upbringing doesn't let me jump on the first man I see. Stupid complexes always come from childhood. (Alright, alright, I'm exaggerating. I'm thankful to my parents for making me who I am.) Still, I'm starting to think, are my requirements for a man really so high - brains and a desire to change something in one's life?
Apart from that, I'm falling in love with everyone who seems at least partly like the one I want to fall in love with. Last one is my auto-school instructor. Geez, I can hardly recall his face ( because I'm looking on the road, not at him during the lessons)but when he opens his mouth I have a strong desire to pull over and ask him to marry me. BECAUSE HE'S CUTE! I mean, he's smart, he's patient ( alright, I'm paying him for being patient, BUT STILL!!!), he is, he is, he is... Kill me someone.
Enough. I'm melting in this enchanting house. Its warmth enthralls me. As always, when winter is so close... Its breath wraps me into dreams and memories. And all I want from the Winter is to give me my love back... Can't it see, that I'm throwing my love in front of the feet of everyone.. take it, you, take it, please... I want to be free.